On www.lovetheirhusbands.com, I posted a blog note on the Ratcheting Up and Ratcheting Down stages of life. As an old guy in the Ratcheting Down stage, I see so many things that I could not see while Ratcheting Up.
You know what I mean. When you are a young person, married a couple of years, with babies coming along, life seems to be constantly getting harder. There is always more noise, more work, more worry, than you had the year before. Remember when you could just get up and go to church? How nice was that, as compared to "getting everyone up and off to church"?
To put it simply, there is a real burden in the Ratcheting Up stage, but that is not what I want to write about here. Here, I want to think just about Ratcheting Down.
Too many people struggle with Ratcheting Down. You know what I mean, that time of life where you are back to just getting yourself ready for church, because your children are gone. You no longer have to go to three ball games every week or spend your evenings helping with math homework or school projects. You can rest and spend time with your spouse and just kind of enjoy things. As for me, I have to say that everything about Ratcheting Down appeals to me.
Now, you have the chance to decide what you will do in the years that remain to you. You can spend time with your wife and friends, without feeling guilty about missing time with your children. You can sit quietly and read or just think. You can lie down when you are tired or go on trips. You can volunteer for things, now that you have free time. You can do so many things that you used to have to set aside for children.
If you are entering a Ratcheting Down phase, do not waste it. We hear of people "struggling with the empty nest," a concept that I cannot really visualize. I love the emptying nest. I love having children with whom I can speak about adult things and for whom I do not have to take daily responsibility. I love having time with my wife. I enjoy being able to read, to study, to watch what I want to watch.
Ratcheting Down is the time where you are freed from so many duties (important duties, to be sure) and now have a chance to do something new. Make it worthwhile. Use your free time to grow closer to God, to serve others more fully, to learn and teach and grow.
Remember Solon's description of himself. Solon was a Greek statesman who retired from power long before he died. In describing his life of retirement, he said "every day he grew older, and learned something new."
May that be true of us as well. Use this time for something more than reading romance novels and watching televisions. Grow, my friend, grow.
You know what I mean. When you are a young person, married a couple of years, with babies coming along, life seems to be constantly getting harder. There is always more noise, more work, more worry, than you had the year before. Remember when you could just get up and go to church? How nice was that, as compared to "getting everyone up and off to church"?
To put it simply, there is a real burden in the Ratcheting Up stage, but that is not what I want to write about here. Here, I want to think just about Ratcheting Down.
Too many people struggle with Ratcheting Down. You know what I mean, that time of life where you are back to just getting yourself ready for church, because your children are gone. You no longer have to go to three ball games every week or spend your evenings helping with math homework or school projects. You can rest and spend time with your spouse and just kind of enjoy things. As for me, I have to say that everything about Ratcheting Down appeals to me.
Now, you have the chance to decide what you will do in the years that remain to you. You can spend time with your wife and friends, without feeling guilty about missing time with your children. You can sit quietly and read or just think. You can lie down when you are tired or go on trips. You can volunteer for things, now that you have free time. You can do so many things that you used to have to set aside for children.
If you are entering a Ratcheting Down phase, do not waste it. We hear of people "struggling with the empty nest," a concept that I cannot really visualize. I love the emptying nest. I love having children with whom I can speak about adult things and for whom I do not have to take daily responsibility. I love having time with my wife. I enjoy being able to read, to study, to watch what I want to watch.
Ratcheting Down is the time where you are freed from so many duties (important duties, to be sure) and now have a chance to do something new. Make it worthwhile. Use your free time to grow closer to God, to serve others more fully, to learn and teach and grow.
Remember Solon's description of himself. Solon was a Greek statesman who retired from power long before he died. In describing his life of retirement, he said "every day he grew older, and learned something new."
May that be true of us as well. Use this time for something more than reading romance novels and watching televisions. Grow, my friend, grow.