I have previously posted about various cliches which are popular in modern Christian circles, but there is something else out there which we need to consider. On the Internet, I frequently receive posts of things that people really like, which purport to be some kind of description of how we are supposed to be. Yesterday, for example, I received two of them. One of them was a "man/boy" comparison, as follows:
The main difference between a boy and a man: A man is aiming at a goal; The boy is drifting aimlessly."
-Boys are students: Men are teachers
--Boys are consumers: Men are producers
-Boys play with toys: Men work with tools
-Boys break things: Men make things
-Boys ask questions: Men give answers
-Boys are disruptive: Men bring order
-Boys run in gangs: Men organize teams
-Boys play house: Men build homes
-Boys shack up: Men get married
-Boys make babies: Men raise children
-A boy won’t raise his own children: A man will raise his and somebody else’s
-Boys invent excuses for failure: Men produce strategies for success
-Boys look for somebody to take care of them: Men look for somebody to take care of
-Boys seek popularity: Men demand respect
Okay, it is kind of cute. But did you notice what is not present? Anything about Christ. Or anything about living a godly life at all.
Is this really who we are? Is being a "man" simply a series of things we are supposed to do, clever phrases we can apply? Think about them, even just a few of them:
"Boys ask questions, men give answers." But what if a man has a question? Men ask questions. Men want to know more than they know. They seek the knowledge of God. We want men who will ask questions. We do not want men who do nothing but attempt to give answers. We all know men who never ask questions but always give answers. They are annoying.
"Boys are students: Men are teachers." Really? I have known many men who were not teachers, yet were godly men. I also teach classes filled with men who are, thereby, students. Every man I have ever respected has been a lifelong student. I learn all the time and seek to learn all the time. I am always a student. Learning, growing, is inherent in a man's purpose in life. If we are gong to be worldly in this regard, consider Solon's great quote: "Every day he grew older, and learned something new." Real men are students.
"Boys play with toys: Men work with tools." Yeah, and men play with toys as well. They hunt, they fish, they search the internet, they play tennis and golf. All of these are good things God has given us to enjoy. Men play with their children and with their friends and with their families. Men play.
"Boys are disruptive: Men bring order." Men are also disruptive, preaching the gospel in places where it is illegal, witnessing for Christ in places where it causes disorder. "Woe unto you when all men speak well of you." Godly men are often very disruptive. Remember how Paul upset whole towns?
"Boys seek popularity: Men demand respect." Well, no. Men do not demand respect, they earn it. It is not important whether anyone respects me, as long as God rules my life. Even if the world does not respect me, yet I may have lived a great life of faith and obedience. Again, "woe unto you when all men speak well of you."
The problem with this kind of list is that it reflects a world-centered view (and not a very complex view). It does not recognize that being a "man of God" is much more than what it views as "being a man," and that much of what it views as "being a man" is not consistent with being a "man of God."
This kind of list is dangerous because it encourages women to a false view of manhood, leaving them unable to understand what God is really doing with the men in their lives and leaving them likely to choose and marry someone other than a man of God. It also encourages men to a false view of what is right for themselves.
God's list is a better list. A man of God, as an example, manifests the fruit of the spirit, a life filled with "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control."
There are other lists in scripture, but it is hard to get away from that list. That is what it means to be a man.
The main difference between a boy and a man: A man is aiming at a goal; The boy is drifting aimlessly."
-Boys are students: Men are teachers
--Boys are consumers: Men are producers
-Boys play with toys: Men work with tools
-Boys break things: Men make things
-Boys ask questions: Men give answers
-Boys are disruptive: Men bring order
-Boys run in gangs: Men organize teams
-Boys play house: Men build homes
-Boys shack up: Men get married
-Boys make babies: Men raise children
-A boy won’t raise his own children: A man will raise his and somebody else’s
-Boys invent excuses for failure: Men produce strategies for success
-Boys look for somebody to take care of them: Men look for somebody to take care of
-Boys seek popularity: Men demand respect
Okay, it is kind of cute. But did you notice what is not present? Anything about Christ. Or anything about living a godly life at all.
Is this really who we are? Is being a "man" simply a series of things we are supposed to do, clever phrases we can apply? Think about them, even just a few of them:
"Boys ask questions, men give answers." But what if a man has a question? Men ask questions. Men want to know more than they know. They seek the knowledge of God. We want men who will ask questions. We do not want men who do nothing but attempt to give answers. We all know men who never ask questions but always give answers. They are annoying.
"Boys are students: Men are teachers." Really? I have known many men who were not teachers, yet were godly men. I also teach classes filled with men who are, thereby, students. Every man I have ever respected has been a lifelong student. I learn all the time and seek to learn all the time. I am always a student. Learning, growing, is inherent in a man's purpose in life. If we are gong to be worldly in this regard, consider Solon's great quote: "Every day he grew older, and learned something new." Real men are students.
"Boys play with toys: Men work with tools." Yeah, and men play with toys as well. They hunt, they fish, they search the internet, they play tennis and golf. All of these are good things God has given us to enjoy. Men play with their children and with their friends and with their families. Men play.
"Boys are disruptive: Men bring order." Men are also disruptive, preaching the gospel in places where it is illegal, witnessing for Christ in places where it causes disorder. "Woe unto you when all men speak well of you." Godly men are often very disruptive. Remember how Paul upset whole towns?
"Boys seek popularity: Men demand respect." Well, no. Men do not demand respect, they earn it. It is not important whether anyone respects me, as long as God rules my life. Even if the world does not respect me, yet I may have lived a great life of faith and obedience. Again, "woe unto you when all men speak well of you."
The problem with this kind of list is that it reflects a world-centered view (and not a very complex view). It does not recognize that being a "man of God" is much more than what it views as "being a man," and that much of what it views as "being a man" is not consistent with being a "man of God."
This kind of list is dangerous because it encourages women to a false view of manhood, leaving them unable to understand what God is really doing with the men in their lives and leaving them likely to choose and marry someone other than a man of God. It also encourages men to a false view of what is right for themselves.
God's list is a better list. A man of God, as an example, manifests the fruit of the spirit, a life filled with "love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control."
There are other lists in scripture, but it is hard to get away from that list. That is what it means to be a man.